Want to really get to know someone? Then go on vacation with them! My husband has always said that experiencing a European vacation when we were dating is what really made him know he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. When you travel with someone not only do you spend a lot of time together but you get to see each other in new scenarios and can learn a lot about them.
Just the act of planning a vacation can be a stressful ordeal. Then thereās the unknown variables like weather, accidents, lost luggage, etc. Not everyone handles stress the same way. How you choose to handle a stressful situation with a travel partner can really say a lot. Do you break down and fight or support each other and work together? In our over 22 years of traveling together my husband and I have encountered various stressful situations including accidents, sickness, destroyed luggage, flight issues, getting lost and terrible weather just to name a few. Yes, there have been times Iāve cried and weāve taken our stress out on each other and strangers. However, for the most part weāve been able to work together as a team to solve issues and get through things that could have turned into bigger disagreements and possibly ruined a trip. All our experience has mostly taught us to go with the flow and make light of situations whenever you can.
Our first vacation ever was a two week trip that brought us to Wales, London, Amsterdam, Brussels and Paris. We traveled via plane, train, car and bus and stayed in various types of lodging, some pre-planned, others not. It was definitely an adventure and we had our share of surprises and stressful situations. Upon entering our hotel room in Brussels we found a filthy room with a bed full of dishes and food scraps. After an exhausting night sleeping on a bus we could have melted down and flipped out on the staff. Instead, we informed them the room needed to be made up and went out to explore the city. From there we couldnāt find our way to the monument we were hoping to visit, got lost AND couldnāt even speak the language! Iāll admit, I got super frustrated but my husband kept me going – some great food and a bottle of wine definitely helped! It by far was not the best day of our trip and Brussels wasnāt my favorite vacation stop, but we still had fun, made memories, I learned a new song and we have stories to tell about our adventure. While in Paris we had reserved what we thought would be an amazing dinner, but the night didnāt go as planned. Upon arriving at the restaurant we were greeted by a dirty looking dog, screamed at by the owner and informed we would eat whatever she served, as she didnāt offer a menu or choices. I decided this was not somewhere I wanted to eat. Unfortunately, after leaving, we quickly realized since it was so late our choices were suddenly very limited. We ended up at a restaurant far worse than our first option probably would have been. My husband could have gotten mad at me for not giving the restaurant he was excited about a try, but instead we just settled for somewhere else. Trust me, Iām still occasionally reminded of that night and we still laugh about our horrible dinner in the restaurant with carpeted walls where a dessert of fruit meant an unpeeled orange on a plate!
Traveling together also gives you an inside peek into what itās like to spend 24hrs together for multiple days at a time. You see how your travel companion acts when theyāre tired or grumpy, what daily routines are, if they hog the bed, etc. These are things that you may not experience just spending a few hours at a time together. Spending an extended period of time together also allows you to see if you truly enjoy each other’s company. Do you get bored or tired of being together? You canāt hide behind makeup 24/7 nor can you keep your real emotions and feelings bottled up for multiple days without an inevitable explosion. When traveling together, you share every hour, meal, plane ride, museum visit and decision. During our trip we had a few small quarrels – mostly about my dislike of his smoking (which he fortunately no longer does) but overall, we really enjoyed spending time together. It was great to get out and share new experiences like climbing the Eiffel Tower and exploring Anne Frank’s Annex. While on our trip we learned that we were similar when it came to organization and planning and that we both like jam packing our days with adventure and trying new things.
When you travel with someone you also learn about each other’s strengths and weaknesses and how to use them. I am terrible at directions and could get lost in my own neighborhood! My husband on the other hand is amazing at finding his way around. Iād probably still be wandering those back streets of Brussels if it wasnāt for him! Heās able to remember names and buildings, recognize where weāve already been and is a pro at reading a map! Our Europe trip made me realize I felt safe and protected with him. He led me where I needed to go, kept us safe and was reassuring when things seemed off. As for me, Iām the one who watches the budget, finds amazing deals and attempts to keep him grounded when he gets crazy ideas – like climbing onto a statue of a lion in Paris.
One of the things I love about our relationship is that we make a great team. Weāre there for each other when needed and know how to unite and work together. A disagreement with a woman at a sandwich shop in Wales showed us this early on. We both knew we were right and quickly realized that neither of us was willing to back down. We supported each other and worked together to make a strong united front. In the end, we were prosperous in not only winning the disagreement and getting what we wanted but also in the amazing feeling of knowing we made it happen together, by teaming up.
Those ten days in Europe showed us that we truly did love each other and even after being together nonstop we wanted more. We explored, made memories, worked through obstacles as a team, learned new things about each other and grew even closer. As time has gone by Iāve come to realize that how we worked together on that trip is similar to how we continue to live our lives together. I do the planning, he often guides the way. When stressful situations arise we work together to get through them. We donāt sweat the small stuff. Our life continues to be an adventure, always on the go looking for new things to see and do. Who would have known that first trip together would have led to so many more and given us such insight into how our future lives would be. So, my advice – when youāre thinking about spending the rest of your life with someone, maybe plan a trip first. You’ll learn a lot about each other and how you do or donāt work together as a team.
Take vacations, go as many places as you can. You can always make money, you can’t always make memories.
